Lonely

Here's the thing: unless you've done this gig, you can never possibly understand how desperately lonely it gets. Usually I get together with people from my MOMS club a few times a week, but with me being sick last week and Sam being sick this week, we've essentially been in isolation. 

I call my mom two or three times a day. I've called old friends, who don't call back. I call my husband 4 or 5 times a day, and hear him get more and more frustrated every single time, because he's trying to work.

I spend my day with the person I love most in the world, but he can't talk to me or relate to me. It is adorable when he tries to feed me a Cheerio or a soggy yogurt melt, but it feels like that's the sum total of my human interaction lately, and it's not enough. 

I do love this gig, but the hard parts are so utterly unlike what I thought they'd be. I know the baby will be feeling better next week, and I'll be able to get back to the usual routine. But right now I'm so lonely I feel like crying.

Comments

[caramama]

It's got to be really tough doing the SAH thing when one of both of you are sick! On my maternity leave, I had to get out of the house every day (after initial recovery) because I just couldn't be home all day alone with the infant. I made lots of trips to Target, even though I didn't always buy things.

I hope he (and you) feels better soon!

[colleen]

Call me when you're lonely! Promise I'll call back.

Colleen